OK, so you might have heard a lot about how “parent sex” is basically what happens in the bathroom with the door locked in the 5 minutes the kids are distracted by ABC2.
I’m not gonna lie though, Continue reading
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Elf on the Shelf: The triumph and the torture
Ahh Christmas. A time for joy, peace, love, celebration and the elaborate charade of moving a lifeless, plastic-faced, vacant eyed, omnipresent stuffed elf from place to place in your home every night just after you’ve fallen asleep on the couch at 8pm.
Because nothing keeps the magic of Christmas alive Continue reading
When life gives you emojis
At the risk of making it appear as though I don’t have a lot going on in my life (I don’t)… Bachelor finales, the surprise appearance of new Instagram filters, long awaited announcements regarding hotly debated emoji updates, and pretty much anything involving Grant Denyer, all elicit pretty extreme responses in me. The kind prompting the excitable, trembly fingered Continue reading
If life was like my Instagram feed
It would be pretty damn perfect. #Blessed even. And not in the ironic way that is my general preference.
My house would be tidy and styled to within an inch of its on trend life. Not just in the one corner in which I choose to arrange the only three stylish items I even own. That were Continue reading
6 reasons jeans shopping sucks when you’re a mum
This week I was forced to endure the self esteem annihilation exercise that is shopping for jeans.
It was either that or continue sporting a saggy-ass pair of black jeans that have stretched to the point of no return. And, having given birth to three babies, I feel like I have the authority to make accurate assessments Continue reading
The birth diagrams that nearly got me kicked out of antenatal class
Can I just start by saying that when it comes to jokes and TV shows, my tastes can be, on occasion, a little bit low brow.
And just for a little bit of unnecessary clarification…
Low-brow
(adjective) Continue reading
Diary of a child free Tuesday
I am carrying a small handbag.
Not just carrying it. Swinging it beside me. Swinging it with carefree abandon.
Aforementioned small swinging handbag contains my wallet, lipgloss, phone, a pair of many times lost and miraculously found again cheap imitation sunglasses, about 17 Continue reading
The three kinds of baby weight that actually count
Having been blessed with three children, twins followed by a singleton, the stubborn determination to lose leftover pregnancy kilos is not a foreign concept to me. It’s one I’ve grappled with, raged about, and at times tortured myself over, with every beleaguered step on my well worn treadmill.
But in the years and more recently Continue reading
7 legit toddler life struggles
– From the (master)mind of a toddler
Walking – aka modern day bait and switch
Ok so you were right. I suppose I can see the merits of this walking thing. Take a few wobbly steps, bask in the glory of my own brilliance, graciously accept praise, cuddles Continue reading
Balloons kill kids: nailing motherhood at Bunnings
I’d just like to thank the good people at Bunnings Warehouse for nearly killing my children.
Now, to be fair, usually on an outing to Bunnings I am quite capable of nearly killing my own children. Continue reading
