50 fast facts you never knew you always wanted to know

1.  If I can hear you chew, I have fantasised about your death.

2. Real pain is when you offer someone some of your food to be polite and they actually take it.

3. I don’t call anyone. I’m basically paying $100 a month to decline incoming calls, forget to Continue reading

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20 lessons from my kids first year of kindy 

imageMy twins starting kindergarten was the proverbial light at the end of the [slightly worn] [not quite as tight as it used to be][prone to occasional leakage] stay at home mum tunnel. And despite a shaky start [for me], I’m now that mum tyre squealing away at 9:01, belting out George Michael’s “Freedom” at the top of her lungs.

As we enter the final term of kindy, ahead of Continue reading

Lesson #647 learnt the hard way: don’t lie in front of your kids (unless you want this to happen) 

imageAs a parent I’ve learnt many lessons along the way. Important lessons, life affirming lessons, lessons I perhaps wish I didn’t have cause to learn.

Things like the fact that everything I ever said or thought about having children before I had them was bullshit. (Insert blanket apology to anyone I ever spoke to Continue reading