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Save the earth; it’s the only planet with coffee 🙏🏻 . . . #adelaide #radelaide #funnymum #mumblog #mummyblog #mumblogger #lifeofamum #wifelife #adelaidemum #mumsofadelaide #mumlife #mother #parent #momlife #mumofthree #samum #family #parenting #adelaideparents #kidsinadelaide #kids #adelaidewriter #adelaidefreelancer #mummyblogger #adelaidekids #streetart #unley #lifeofamum #wallcharades

This is 37 I bloody guess. 🤷‍♀️ I look far more elated about it here than I actually am. If you zoom in on my face you’ll see that it’s more an expression of sheer terror than jubilation. How.am.i.so.old!!??? I like to think that every day now is a day closer to the day I have poison injected into my face. Jab jab hooray! 37; it’s better than being dead! 🤣🤷‍♀️ . . . . #adelaide #radelaide #funnymum #mumblog #mummyblog #mumblogger #lifeofamum #wifelife #adelaidemum #mumsofadelaide #mumlife #mother #parent #momlife #mumofthree #samum #family #parenting #adelaideparents #kidsinadelaide #kids #adelaidewriter #adelaidefreelancer #mummyblogger #adelaidekids #streetart #glenelg #lifeofamum #wallcharades

Does anyone else have children that are just SO FKN LOUD? Wherever we go, my children, are AT PEAK DECIBELS!!! All the OTHER children in our vicinity are normal, moderately toned humans, speaking just loudly enough for one to know they exist but not so loud that THE ENTIRE PERIMETER OF THE AREA can FEEL the vibrations of their vocal chords and also all the animals immediately scared into trans seasonal hibernation. All I can say to everyone and anyone who ever HEARS US COMING in public and then also has to share a space with us and our CONSTANT SONOROUS VOLUME is.. I’m sorry. I do try to cajole them into a less anti social level of screaming every thought that comes into their little heads with deafening intensity. But, somewhat ironically, they don’t listen. 🤣

I cannot apologise enough for putting my giant face right smack bang in the middle of your Instagram feed, but can I ask you for a moment, to take your eyes off the enormous sweeping landscape that is my forehead [blessedly half cut off because my photographer du jour is a four year old] and cast your eyes down towards my T-shirt. "Faith, Hope, Love" - Three simple, yet powerful words to comfort the women and their family and friends on their journey of pregnancy loss. Haley Elliott owner of Mum Life the Label @mumlifethelabel and @yvettemystakas, writer, mental health advocate, and blogger of She is Sacred are coming together during May for #miscarragematters to raise funds for The Pink Elephant Support Network - a non for profit organisation supporting women who have experienced pregnancy loss before 20 weeks. $5 from each t-shirt sold will be donated to The Pink Elephant Support Network. Visit @mumlifethelabel and follow the link in their bio to the website to purchase your very own t-shirt today in support of what is an incredible cause. Over the years, I’ve been pretty transparent about my journey to motherhood and my struggles with recurring miscarriage. I don’t usually lend my giant forehead to causes [altho maybe I should... billboard space $$$ 🤣🤣], but this one, so dear to my heart, and spearheaded by my beautiful friend @yvettemystakas was an immediate yes from me. #misscarriagematters #mumlifethelabel

I would LOVE to give you a flowery recap of my amazing Mother’s Day filled with waffles and fucking strawberries and roses and I dunno, less lemons than lemonade [or, even better, Lululemon], but alas I cannot. Today my kids were their glorious selves and it just so happens that their glorious selves, quite often means them being total and utter assholes. The middle child committed to full scale tantrum mode within 15 seconds of waking me up because the other two had walked into my bedroom before her and this, apparently, “wasn’t part of the plan”. This escalated to a fully blown “I’m going to rip up your Mother’s Day card” show down while I was blearily trying to figure out what time it was and if I had woken up alive, and that’s just the first 15 minutes of my day. Their father was at work. And boy did they make me pay for it. Highlights include multiple bouts of In Public Screaming [my absolute fave Mother’s Day present of all time] and an actual stick thrown at my actual face in front of other actual parents who’s kids we’re being actual angels. We also had Under Chair Writhing In A Public Place, leading to Under The Breath Threats which always works to showcase to the general vicinity my amazing ability to mother these high energy, loud, crazy humans in High Stress Situations like having a “relaxing dinner out”. I cried about 14 times. That’s an understatement. It was more like 40. I BEGGED them to be nice to me, and each other, for Just One Day. They did not comply. I brought out the big guns and put them to bed at 11:45. AM!!! And all this is a stark reminder to Lower My Expectations. I’m not even mad or sad. This is the motherhood. Its brutal. It’s exhausting. It makes you fucking crazy. But at the end of the god damn shitty frkn day you love those little fuckers so damn much you still spend the evening looking at the photos you took of them because they’re your whole [loud][crazy][rowdy][insane] bloody world! Motherhood is an exercise in contradictions and, moreover, the bedazzling allure of day drinking🤣.

When we go out, we like to contrive faux album covers for when my children become the biggest sibling band since the Jonas Brothers and they finally start contributing to the lavish lifestyle to which I wish to become accustomed. And by “we”... I mean me. #butwhoistheJOE . . . . . #adelaide #radelaide #funnymum #mumblog #mummyblog #mumblogger #lifeofamum #wifelife #adelaidemum #mumsofadelaide #mumlife #mother #parent #momlife #mumofthree #samum #family #parenting #adelaideparents #kidsinadelaide #kids #adelaidewriter #adelaidefreelancer #mummyblogger #adelaidekids #streetart #glenelg #lifeofakid #wallcharades

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