Disclaimer: If you’re part of my family or friends or know me in real life in any capacity, see me at school drop off, might run into me randomly at the supermarket somehow, work with my husband or just generally think I look familiar and you may have met me once, you should probably stop reading this post at this point because it contains more information about my nether regions than you probably need know about. Continue reading
Parenting 101
Merry Birthmas – a lazy mum’s guide to December birthdays
At the risk of offending anyone with a healthy dose of too much information, my husband and I are March breeders.
I don’t know what they’re putting in the water come autumn, but it must be a little shoo-wop shoo-waddy-waddy yippity boom-de-boom, because when we were trying to conceive, before you could say chang-chang Continue reading
Life in the madhouse: have three kids!
Despite the fact that I’ve been told I really only have two children because my first were twins [please tell me this when I am singlehandedly trying to extricate three small, wilful individuals who have suddenly lost the ability to move their own limbs with any degree of coordination, from their car seats, in the rain, whilst a stream of traffic is waiting for me to shut the door and 2 out of 4 of us need Continue reading
Lesson #647 learnt the hard way: don’t lie in front of your kids (unless you want this to happen)
As a parent I’ve learnt many lessons along the way. Important lessons, life affirming lessons, lessons I perhaps wish I didn’t have cause to learn.
Things like the fact that everything I ever said or thought about having children before I had them was bullshit. (Insert blanket apology to anyone I ever spoke to Continue reading
Dear coffee… Thank you for making me a better mother
Just published on The Motherish
I sometimes struggle to espresso myself, but the time has come to give an appreciative nod of gratitude to that which gets me through the day. Coffee, my old friend. Always there when I need you; making me a better mother, nay, a better human.
Motherhood is like a Continue reading
Surprise…It’s a baby!
When you find out you’re pregnant there are so many decisions ahead of you; breast or bottle, cloth or disposable, cameleon or donkey (prams not pets). Doctors. Hospitals. Names. Birth plans. Nursery furniture. It’s just one big long list of things to do and stuff to pick. Continue reading
Balloons kill kids: nailing motherhood at Bunnings
I’d just like to thank the good people at Bunnings Warehouse for nearly killing my children.
Now, to be fair, usually on an outing to Bunnings I am quite capable of nearly killing my own children. Continue reading
An open letter to my (pregnant) best friend
I mentioned recently that my best ever friend in the long, extensive and tumultuous world history of best friends, is expecting her first baby in July. I’m pretty excited because, frankly, we have a small gang to populate and it’s about time she started pulling her weight. Not to mention, the idea of having mini me’s and mini her’s running around together becoming mini us’s, is pretty all-time. Continue reading
3 mum things I promise I won’t (read: will try very hard not to) do on social media
Before becoming a parent, there was a vast list of things I said I would never do. Irritating things that I saw other people do with their kids, that I swore black and blue, upside down and inside out would not be me. Well. Like all of us, I’ve probably done most of them. Continue reading
My 6 month old baby is going to get an apartment next week and move out
And I’m not cool with it.
It feels like yesterday I was being handed a tiny, squawky, shmoo covered baby who looked up at me with big blue eyes, a wrinkley pink forehead and promptly shat on me.
What with such an inauspicious start, I was hopeful that my little baby Continue reading
eenie meenie miney mum 